Cockroaches are a higher life form

It's not that we can't think of anything to say when Madrid win, which of course they do on occasions. It's more the fact that, well let's face it, it's bloody good news - and therefore newsworthy - when they don't. We could go on about Beckham's second recent blatant handball in last weekend's game against the lowly Alavés, but we won't. Unfortunately, the most noteworthy aspect of the game was the Alavés president's racist comments about the three Madrid Brazilian players - who did the "cucaracha" (cockroach) dance to celebrate their second goal. Piterman (for that is the scumbag's name), declared that "Everyone knows that cockroaches are black". Well round here Mr. Piterman we have a whole armoury of adjectives to describe racists like yourself - we'd be happy to deliver them in person if you'd like to make contact. Elsewhere, Barça have a couple of goleadas under their belt after two 4-1 victories this week in the liga and the champions. The first, was declared to be the result of referee's assistance (?!) by the madridista press, which was strangely silent on Beckham's handball. Celta knocked Getafe off the top spot despite their drubbing of the other Madrid team atletico, but then we don't carry a torch for Getafe either after their racist attack on Eto'o in an earlier meeting. Not all madrileños are of this mentality but there's too much of it around that's for sure. Anyway, another weekend of matches coming up, and though Princess Raul will be all puffed up after her 50th euro goal, there's still plenty of room for more newsworthy events to come as the geriatricos lumber on.

Cold turkey

Is the festive season over already? Madrid sent our own Bilbao packing with a resounding 3-1 win - this we recognise. However, to be fair the comments of Fernando Lamikiz, the Bilbao manager, are a fairish if partial reflection of the real state of play. Madrid dominated the game for about 20 minutes and made the most of it to stretch the margin by two goals in their favour - Bilbao deserved a draw. There was plenty of bad blood about, as there always is between the most Basque of teams and Madrid with all their Madridismo - just take a look at the sea of fascist propaganda at the Fondo Sur end of the ground, not to mention Princess Raul's antics every time the two meet. The game degenerated into a hacking match as it so often does, with Woodgate unwhittingly entering into the spirit of things and trying to cripple anyone coming his way. That was why he was given a rousing ovation as he left after being sent off - this was Bilbao and he'd been having a go at the Basques (even if he didn't realise it). Still, he managed to score his debut goal, even if it was in his own net and provided us here at a-m with moment of well-appreciated mirth (see photo). Thanks Woody keep it up, let's hope your first hat trick's just as impressive.

Deja vú.

We would have posted sooner, really, only we've been laughing so hard the last couple of days - sorry, but we do think it's just too good to last. Landing up at the local hostelry to share the evenings entertainment with the local atletistas was the moment we heard of Madrid's unfortunate evening at the hands of their traditional friends español - a case of history repeating itself after last year. Much good natured laughter and thumb flicking etc as you might imagine, and the evening to be rounded off nicely with atleti's well deserved victory over Barça. A more confident and assured performance than has been seen for some time. To top it all the local Madrid underdogs - Getafe - currently lead the Spanish first division, with Madrid a distant 15th. Naturally, the referee was to blame for Madrid's debacle: apparently he had blown for a penalty (against them) a millisecond before the ball went in the net (or some such bollocks) - see photo of Madrid getting all upset with the ref, Princess Raul particularly beside herself. Anyway, it all adds to to the general hilarity and merriment around here as the geriatricos lumber on buying fancy footworkers without any real sense of direction or gameplan. The only blot on the evening's pleasantries the lighter thrown at Eto'o - zero tolerance of that kind of apparently racist behaviour in this neck of the woods.
Athletic de Bilbao - the team of choice around here - take on Madrid this week, though their track record isn't always that good against the old enemy. We live in hope.

I wish it could be Christmas every day

Was it just our imagination or did it seem as if Christmas had come early this week? The Poms grabbing the ashes back off the Aussies, Liverpool showing some class against the valient Betis, and last - but definitely not least - Madrid taking a licking from Lyon. Just some of the language used to describe this happy event in a brief mainstream press round-up: "massive upset, "thrashed", "onslaught", "se desplome" (collapse, crash), "un gran batacazo" (a good thumping), etc. But surely the headline of the week goes to the Guardian online for "Here Vigo, here Vigo, here Vigo" - referring of course to Madrid's last humiliation at the hands of Celta Vigo (see previous posting). Naturally the sound can be heard of knives being unsheathed for the head of trainer Luxemburgo; as we've seen before, this is the usual response from the home crowd and the madridista press - after all he's not from round here. Let's see if Español are in festive spirit this weekend.

You don't say.

This week's results see Madrid languishing one place above Cadiz, who you might remember they stole the march on with a handball and offside goal in the first game of the season. Of course, this rough justice wasn't reflected in the Madridista press, with much overblown vaunting of their performance and the fancy footwork of their new Brazilian signing Robinho. All the more amusing then to hear the howls of anguish from the same organs of glib reporting at their loss - at home no less - to the maybe mighty again Celta (2-3). The whingy whining on this occasion caused by a "goal that never was" (see photo). All the papers carried the same inconclusive picture, which is sold as proof positive that they wuz robbed.
Here at a-m we'd like to think that the ball was just on the line, as it all adds to the sense of sadistic glee that keeps us going and is all part of the grand incentive for producing this blog in the first place. Thanks also to the good folk at Blogger for allowing us to upload the pictures that illustrate this particular human tragedy. Oh, and this week Cadiz won by the way.

How much? I'll take two!

Madrid start the season as they mean to go on. Cadiz played the game of their lives and most definitely had Madrid on the ropes in the second half as they were holding them to a 1-1 draw when, imagine our surprise when Beckham hand-balled in the penalty area in full view of the entire stadium, but curiously not the referee. An incredulous Cadiz were caught on the hop and the ball was whisked down to the other half at such speed that Princess Raul was so offside that the entire stadium saw it, except curiously not the linesman. Madrid 1-2 up and a demoralised Cadiz crumpled under the pressure. Foul, we cry. And, what's more, we feel bound to ask the pertinent question - just how much does a referee cost these days? And do linesmen come any cheaper? Our legal adviser feels bound to point out that we're not actually suggesting that Madrid would stoop so low as to bribe an official - oh, no - we're just wondering, that's all.
The boy wonder Owen makes his weary and more worldly-wise way back to the Premiership, feeling underappreciated by Madrid, despite being one of their leading goal scorers last season - certainly leaving Princess Raul in the shade. Sorry lad, you're not media fodder, you too self-effacing and you're certainly not enough of a drama queen or prima donna. And come to think of it, you're not really a Madridista. Hope you'll be happy at Newcastle, for England's sake at least - but you didn't think that Liverpool would buy back at twice what they sold you for because you were feeling homesick. No trophies, just a chance to sup at the poisoned chalice.